Through A Daughter's Eyes: Watching Dad's Valley of Cancer

Dad came back from the hospital today with a list of things to help take care of himself and prepare himself for pending surgery. There is no cure, but the objective of the surgery is to help make him more comfortable. I'm not sure when the surgery is or what the outcome of it will be.

Dad had an appointment in Calgary today and he and Mom went up to the Foothills Hospital by ambulance all the way from the Raymond Hospital; it was a three hour journey each way, as the hospital was way in the north end of Calgary. The appointment was with a Dr. Ruther, an oncologist in Calgary at Cancer Centre. It turns out that the main tumor is in the right adrenal gland and it metastasized to the liver and lung.  Obviously, there is no medical cure, but it could possibly be controlled. It is a rare cancer, however, and treatment for this cancer seems to be more available in Calgary than in Lethbridge. I am very curious to see how this will be handled when winter comes, as winters here are usually very bad. Dad's next appointment, as far as we know, is on September 29th.

I got some soup from some family friends and took it to the hospital, but when I arrived there, Dad was so soundly asleep that I thought he had died. I yelled and he woke up in a flash and relieved, I gave him the soup and watched as he ate a few bites before telling me to take it home; he had eaten soup for dinner, he was full, and didn't feel well. He thanked me for bringing the soup and I asked him if he was scared for his appointment in Calgary tomorrow and such and he shrugged. I told him I loved him, he thanked me again, and then I left him to rest. My worst nightmare at this point concerning this situation is going to the hospital to drop something off for him and finding him dead in the hospital bed, completely alone.

7-8:30 p.m. I visited Dad at the hospital with Mom and I told him that I've made peace with him and everything that happened in the past, as I had forgiven everything when I was 24. I also told him that there is nothing bad between us and that I love him dearly and that I hope he can be at peace too.

12:02 p.m. I followed the Spirit's prompting to visit Dad at the hospital alone. He was asleep, but I hugged him, kissed him, and he woke up. We talked briefly before he went to the bathroom and afterwards, I told him that I loved him and he said, "I want to die."

Anger is one of the stages following the diagnosis of a serious illness and that mixed with alcohol and Percocet can cause problems not only for the diagnosed, but the loved ones of the diagnosed. A day of devastation and tragedy happened today. The family was heading to Lethbridge and Dad fell as he was walking to the car, which caused him to become very aggressive towards my mom and belligerent in general. Concerned for my dad, my mom went inside and phoned the family doctor and he phoned the paramedics to come to the house. Dad threatened to kill Mom in front of the paramedics. When the paramedics arrived, Dad refused to go with them and was belligerent/aggressive enough that the paramedics phoned the RCMP out of concern for everyone else's safety. When an officer from the local RCMP detachment arrived, Dad was even more belligerent and aggressive and the officer basically told him that he could either go to jail or to the hospital with the paramedics. Dad wisely chose to go t

10:17 a.m. Dad had a biopsy yesterday at Lethbridge Regional Hospital at about 7:30 a.m. Today, he is having a body scan and is currently filling out a questionnare and will eventually be taken to the room for the scan. He doesn't have to change into a gown; lucky him. He expresses a lot of fear through becoming angry at everyone else; poor Dad.